My Sacrifice

After little thought and a lot of consideration for my own good, I've decided to offer myself to the world of business.
I will accept the job as CEO of any company of note. (ie. big bucks)

I am uniquely qualified. I know the drill and I can't add.
First of course I'll have my picture, suitably photo shopped, in the financial papers and blogs. Then I'll fire the obligatory 1,500 workers. I'll sell my stock the next day to catch the profit that will roll off the stockmarket.
I'll give a few interviews where in I'll praise the spirit of the American worker, and lament voluably about the uncertainty of the economic climate (We just don't know whats going to happen).
I'll go on vacation.
Then I'll have my people start a 'good natured' twitter campaign about where our national headquarters should be located.Two 18 year olds should manage to generate enough air blither to attract the reporter types.
I'll sit back and see which city offers me the most money and tax exemptions to house the company. This part is fun and I will no doubt manage to get one city to offer all the above and throw in a world class facility from which we can work.
I'll choose the architect and builders- based on the time proven method of who pays me the most.
Then I'll dine out and be cultured. I'll use the butter lavishly, praising all I see and meet.
At the turn of the year I'll resign to spend more time with my family.
Naturally, leaving while I'm at the top of the game will benefit me greatly as the directors will buy out my contract and give me health care, country club membership and residential help forever.

When the 22 maintenance workers move into the headquarters a few years down the road (I will have had to promise the feds some low and middle income jobs) I plan to be in Switzerland. I love Lake Geneva.