Papered to madness for Johnmybrother

Spent the morning filling in forms, calling people and trying to make out various gov't. papers. Clarity is not their forte.
In one of my work incarnations I was a secretery for Legal Aid. Naturally I worked in a mental hospital.
I was astounded and grateful to get the job. Cyndi was preggers and living with me. I'd quit my last job when the boss got his gun and went after the delivery guy. I just couldn't figure out why they hired me. I could only type 45 words a minute in a strong wind.
Come to find they wanted an English Major to keep the grammar clean, to research and to refill the binders when law changed and a new law needed to be inserted. More importantly they wanted a person to go over to the building where the mental hospital was housed  do the required interview with the patients.
Fine with me. I was right at home among the patients, most of whom were drugged way past all reason and good medical practice into a comotose state. Generally their only problem was drooling, poor bunnies. They did face a lifelong sentence in one of the big state hospitals, thus the presence of Legal Aid.
The point is, I was a lousy secretery. I had to bribe the people down the hall to do any quick fancy typing.
I hated keeping records. I could never remember what day it was and I had trouble telling time.
I still hate records. I hate stray papers with fill in the blanks. I hate remembering all the damn numbers-my social and John's, the state numbers, the feds. I hate official headings which tell me I'm dealing with the State Personal Prying , Waste Management and Really Advocation Committee. I REALLY, REALLY HATE PHONE TREES.
I think that the answer to our nations' problems is simple. Destroy all phone trees. Install some people. Pay very little if you must, but insist that these people be local-the US-and speak English or Spanish. People would rejoice. Business would get done. Happy hearts would swell with joy at a question answered.
BAN. "Hello, your phone call is important to us. We may monitor it for our purposes. If you want to buy and hinge, press one. If you want to see our vet, press two. If you want to hear our recorded message about your taxes, press three. If you want................................................and if you are hard of hearing press 128764509784720675409 and we'll amp up the sound of our elevator musik. Have a nice Day!"